Coca-Cola Cherry – The Perfect Synthesis of Everything You Hate in Coke and Cough Syrup

I was shopping at Mustafa yesterday when I saw this:

What a beautiful can, what an interesting flavour!
What a beautiful can, what an interesting flavour!

It’s Coca-cola Cherry Flavour.

I thought to myself: Oh, what an interesting flavour!

Plus, I was very attracted to the colour of the can. So pretty!

The Fiancée warned that it might just taste like cough syrup and coke, as is the case of almost everything that claims to be cherry-flavoured. She cautioned that I might be scarred for life after drinking this.

But hey… There’s a chance Coca-cola might have made one that doesn’t taste like cough syrup, right?

Anyway… It doesn’t hurt to buy and try one, right? It’s only SGD$0.90.

So, this morning, I opened the can to try it out.

As you can see (in the picture below), the drops of Coke still looks like Coke. I was worried, yet hoping, that it would be pink in colour.

It looks like Coke. Will it taste as good as coke?
It looks like Coke. Will it taste as good as coke?

So, with that, I took my first sip.

IT WAS BLOODY AWFUL! It tasted exactly like cherry-flavoured cough syrup. EEEWWW!!! DISGUSTING!!!

Just to be sure, I took a second sip.

OH GOSH! It’s awful! Oh, the humanity. It’s so bad, I could swear off Coke for the rest of my life.

Heck… It’s so bad, even Dr. Pepper tastes a lot better than this (Dr. Pepper is rather so-so in flavour – at least it doesn’t taste like cough syrup).

And worse of all, it didn’t have any taste that makes Coke taste nice. No… Instead, what they kept was everything I hate about Coke – the dry feeling in your mouth, the super sugary taste, etc. Urgh…

Gosh… Who on earth decided that this was a good idea? It’s the perfect synthesis of everything everyone hates about cough syrup and Coke. It is not meant for human consumption.

And worst of all, it leaves a horrible lingering aftertaste. It’s the aftertaste of despair and agony. I think I need to brush my teeth and rinse my mouth with mouthwash. It’s gross.

I couldn’t continue drinking. In the end, I poured the rest of the can down the sink. I hear Coke is a great way to clean your pipes.

My review: Avoid this like the plague. Only buy this as a gift to your enemies. Do not even consume this unless the pain of your very existence is so agonising that you need something worse to console yourself that your existence is not as bad as it seems.