An Ode to Coffee!

Oh wow… It’s been so long since I last drank coffee. I drank a cup today and WOW! I feel so wonderful. I feel like I’m at the top of the world once again!

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The last time I drank coffee was about a month ago? I’m not sure, but it feels like a long time has passed. I don’t know. Somehow, not drinking coffee for such a long time has a very depressing effect. I feel like Samson without his long hair, or Popeye without his spinach. I feel like a zombie. It’s been a really unproductive month without coffee. The other day, I sat in front of my computer, photosynthesizing before the bright screen for hours, and guess what? I did absolutely NOTHING! Not a single word was added, edited or removed from my thesis! I think I sat there for about five hours. Very unproductive, very depressing. There’s nothing more depressing than sitting in front of your computer knowing you have something due soon, and yet there’s nothing you can do about it.

Well, today, I drank a small cup of coffee, and BANG! I easily wrote two thousand words just like that! I guess I should put myself back on caffeine once again.

Anyway, I was quite surprised to see this at Starbucks today:

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Look at that! It’s a HUGE BOX of coffee!!! I think you can fit ten grande cups in that thing. And it only costs SGD$26.90! If I could attach this as an IV drip to me, I think I can productively finish my thesis in a single night. Ok, maybe I don’t need an IV drip. Maybe a long straw would suffice.

Oh, coffee, coffee, how I love thee!

Well, ok, that was a short update. Before I begin writing again, I rightly should (as a huge sci-fan fan of Dune), recite the Mentat’s mantra, or rather, the modified one for coffee (it’s amazing how I have actually memorised it):

It is by will alone that I set my mind in motion.
It is by the juice of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the lips acquire stains,
the stains become a warning.
It is by will alone I set my mind in motion.

(If you have no idea about the context behind it, in the movie, Dune, there are human supercomputers, called Mentats, who drink a special drink that enables them to compute things at light speed. One of the mentats chants this mantra before he drinks it. Somehow, the words of this mantra seems to refer to coffee, or Red Bull depending on what beverage you enjoy abusing to stay productive.)

Ok, back to work!